Sunday, January 27, 2008

Friday, January 25, 2008

A Love Letter to Music

*Listens to Adagio for Strings, op.11*

How I oblige your magic spells...
As I sit in your garden filled with mystical scent...
Grab at my neck...
Enforce with your nails...
It is in vain that I seek to understand...
This love is laid within the legnth of the life of the sun...
I let the arms of Melody embrace me
as the closing arms of the Labyrinth....
You may have my last breath....
You may share my red wine...
You may have my last cigarette...
You have invaded me like the sound of a single note.....
like a symphonie of pain....
an unforgettable pain deep within my soul...
lovers cannot forget All the oaths of heart,
all the pledges of love....
haunt me in the night...
haunt me in my dreams...if you please....
I want to understand your language,
so I may invade your thoughts....
Invade me with one thousand kisses,
for you have introduced me to love....
and as you shout deeper,
I will go into your moving sands,
and let you speak the most abominable words...
and lure me into the sweetest of dreams...
for I am your servant boy...
who you have given the gift of invisibility....
and among the shade...
among the night...
among the masks...
and among the black leather....
I may still shine...
For I am your servant boy...
and I need not seek the illusory symptoms of love..
for I possess them deeply...

Recap : Opening Party at Privet in Vegas


Current mood: Weeping
On my way home from Sundance, I got stuck overnight in Las Vegas, fortunately, my best friend Bree lives there and it wasn't as bad as it could've been...

The LV airport is my favorite place in the whole world...
So is Wal Mart in middle America on the day before Christmas...

Before I left the airport, I had to make it to a gate pretty far away from the gate i deplaned from to reschedule my flight. A woman who was about 70 years old cut in front of me in line and pretended to be deaf when I called her on it...
She could hear her name when she was called for her stand-by seat just fine...

I didn't have my luggage, it was in Burbank collecting dust and probably being rifled through by an underpaid complaint box, so I needed to get some shoes, considering I was going out and didn't like what shoes I had on, so I went to the Gucci store after we ate (it was right next to the restaurant) and got some new kicks...
I'm so Gucci...

We got to the club around 11 and I could tell from the people in line that it was gonna be the best night ever...
1. Dude with a 2 foot spiked mohawk
2. Every guy in Ed Hardy
3. Fake cans everywhere
4. Bad make up
5. Bad shoes
6. Bad bags
7. A Tranny

My recap could've been all about the line to get in...

We were seated at a table with my best friend Bree and her husband's (AC) friend who kinda run's the place...
We started sitting in the actual booth, but later moved up to the top part of the seat in the booth because apparently you're cooler the higher you sit... The coolest people stand on the top of the booth... More people can see you and you can do all your cool dance moves for them.

Jermaine Dupri was flown in from the ATL to DJ the opening night party.
We will get back to this soon...

A black guy in front of me (dressed in sparkly Ed Hardy from head to toe, huge fake cubic zirconium earrings) kept bumping me and not saying excuse me. Huge pet peeve. I didn't say anything, as he was friends with the dude who's booth we were sitting in. Later in the night when one of the many horrible songs came on, in which he knew all the words to, he put his arm around me and started bouncing up and down and singing to me, like I was gonna sing back to him. He was surely mistaken.

I sat down and stared at his clothes for a while and became very depressed. I suddenly imagined myself in a coffee shop, belting out a spoken word poem that started something like this, "Back in the day they stole your smile so you clothe your teeth in gold and your clothes in diamonds..."

I weep for the future.

"Yo, this is Jermaine Dupri, I'm in the building."
"Janet Jackson is in the building"
Was hoping the next line was, "Kriss Kross is in the building"
(Jump was played later on, btw.)

JD had a guy selecting every song for him and setting them up in Serato for him to play.
Mistake number 1.

Honestly, one of the worst set's of all time.

He played the new Mary J song, and followed it up with what he thought would be a good song to play for whitey, "Come As You Are" by Nirvana...
Mistake number 2.

This was followed up by a whole set of bad rock for whitey...

Bad mixing.
Bad song decisions.
Bad mp3s.
Bad digital noise.
Bad.

Jermaine and I go way back, he used to jump on the turntables with me back in the day all the time...
I'm allowed to talk shit...

When the crowd was standing around bored and uninterested, they had the bright idea to stop the music and shoot "$2500" dollars into the crowd... It was more like $100. He didn't play "Make it Rain".
More bad music for a while, crowd less interested and starting to leave, he stopped the music again and shot out another "$2500" ($100). He didn't play "Make it Rain" again.

The tranny sat at our booth at one point.

When someone at a table orders a bottle over a certain amount of money, a waitress walks out of the back with it and it has a sparkler on top of it. They walk through the crowd with it to your table so everyone can see that you're spending your rent on a bottle of booze. I imagined snatching JD from the DJ booth, attaching a sparkler to his head and walking through the crowd with him on my shoulders, finally delivering him to his booth where Janet could blow it out. "Happy MLK day!"

The guy whose booth we were in let me know he knew Jermaine as well, I told him I taught him how to DJ, he replied, "You should've done a better job..."

The tranny was now on top of the booth dancing.
She was apparently one of the coolest people in the room.
She had tape on her balls.

Good times.

An asian guy dressed like a clown was having a dance battle with a drunk white guy.
Nobody won.

Mark the Spark rules.

A blonde girl with huge fake cans was dancing on the booth right behind me.
I saw her panties.
They weren't cute.

A waiter brought another bottle to our table, this time no sparkler, he asked the guy whose booth it was, "Do you really want me to light this?"
"Yeah man, light that motha fucka up!!!"
He was bummed he had to do it, but he did, nonetheless.
He stood there wishing he was anywhere else.
So did I.
(He was the coolest guy in the room.)

Jermaine played 20 seconds of "Planet Rock".
I was happy for 20 seconds.

Everyone tries to one up everyone else all night.
"I know so and so.."
"Oh yeah? Well, I know so and so..."
Watch me do the new dance moves.
Oh yeah? Watch ME do the new dance moves better.
I can drink 2 shots of Jager in a row.
Oh yeah? I can drink 3 shots of Jager in a row.
I have 4 pieces of Ed Hardy on.
Oh yeah? I have 5 pieces of Ed hardy on.
I have big fake cans.
Oh yeah? I have big fake cans AND a cock.
OK, you win.

A point came where we just couldn't stand the music anymore and had to leave.
Sorry Jermaine.

Vegas rules!


Vodka on the rocks : 5
Cigarettes : 12
Trannys : 8
Bad songs : All except 2
Janet Jacksons : 1
Money shot into the crowd : "$5000" ($200)
Guys who thought we were dancing partners : 1
Articles of Ed Hardy clothing : 374
Times I wished I was in bed : 22
Girls that noticed me in my all black outfit hiding under my hat in the corner : 0
Sparklers that came to our table : 5
Fake cans : 82 (pairs)
Times the guy bumped me without saying "Excuse me..." : 9
Bathroom attendants who tried to pressure me into giving them a tip : 1
Guys who were so Gucci : 1
People who I connected with on any level :3
High fives on the dance floor : 17
Weaves : 28
Mowhaks : 2
Guys who run the Palms nightlife who got sucker punched : 1
People I met and shook hands with : 16
People I met and shook hands with that didn't look me in the eye when we met : 15
Huge black guys who stepped on my foot and crushed it : 1

Vegas : Priceless

Recap : My Amazing Summer in and out of Las Vegas

The airport, in general, is depressing, but the Vegas airport really
gives you a good idea what the rest of the country really looks like.
The thing about it is, I really don't want to know what the rest of
the country looks like, I've been to all the malls across our great
land and I get the vibe... Mental note : Drive to Vegas more often.

Reasons for me to go to Vegas :

Visit my best friend Bree (DJ 88) and her husband, AC, who decided to
leave Los Angeles to pursue a life in the City of Sin.
Travel with my band, She Wants Revenge, to perform a show.
DJ some parties that are typically filled with knuckle-heads.

Lure:

The guys from 944 / Racket, who I love, really had a hand in making
my summer in Vegas, amazing.
They had a party one night at Lure, which is now called Blush, and
flew me out to spin. Best DJ experience ever!
We were all having drinks, when the time came for me to go on, Bree
was spinning before me, getting the party started.

1:12 am : Adam plays his first song.
1:14 am : Adam plays his second song.
1:15 am : Manager of Lure, unaccustomed to hearing good music,
immediately pulls Adam off the decks.
1:16 am : Adam stops playing records and freaks out.
1:16:30 am Everyone else freaks out.
1:17 am : DJ that works at Lure puts on Rob Base and DJ E-Z Rock, "It
Takes Two".
1:17 am : Manager of Lure is very, very happy.
1:17 am : Everyone else is not happy.
1:25 am : David from 944 and Adam have a battle of wits.
1:28 am : We kill the bottle of Patron and bail.

Lure rules!

Hanging at Tryst with DJ Create and crew :

One beautiful Sunday night we all rolled down to Tryst to hang with
our good friend Dave Fogg (DJ Create) and I was invited to do a set...
I was on a mid 90's hip hop mission that night, and was ready to drop
some gems.

2:27 am : Adam plays his first gem.
2:28 am : Manager of Tryst comes running in the booth and says, "
Suge Knight is here, stop playing hip hop!"
2:29 am : Adam's mid 90's hip hop mission comes to an end.
2:49 am : Adam is at the bar ordering a drink.
2:50 am : Suge and his lady friend park at the bar next to Adam.
2:51 am : Adam farts on Suge's lady friend.
2:51:13 am : Suge's lady friend moves away, with the quickness.
2:52 am : We all die laughing.

Tryst Rules!

The Griffin, random Friday, spinning with DJ 88 :

Back room of the Griifin.
8 people.
Apparently the Juke box in the front room is blessed.

Drunk guy : "You should let me hop on the tables with you guys, my
name is George Leonard, I produce songs for Madonna."
"Totally, dude."
"I produce songs for Madonna."
"Um, totally, dude."
"Madonna."
"Dude."
"I'll play some really, really, really great tunes if you let me get
on..."
"What songs did you produce?"
"My studio is in Prague."
"Er, um, where in Prague? I have friends who live there..."
"You know, the south side, I told you, my name is Hans Reginald, my
studio is in Prague..."
"Did you know that Pathological liars, or, "mythomaniacs", may be
suffering from histrionic personality disorder or narcissistic
personality disorder? Here is a quick checklist to tell if someone is
a pathological liar : 1. They add exaggerations on to every sentence.
2. They change their story all the time. 3. They believe what they
say is true, when everyone else knows that it isn't. 4. They are
legends in their own minds. Kick rocks."

Gwen Stefani After Party at Moon :

They guy spinning before me was playing the usual suspects, to a room
jam packed with tourists and a few celebs.
I, once again, was on a late 80's to mid 90's hip hop mission. At
this point in my DJ career, I just want to play dope shit, so you can
imagine the problems I may encounter, doing so, for a room filled
with people who want to hear "Umbrella".

Blonde girl wearing something too small : "Are you gonna play any hip
hop?"
"What would you call what I'm playing now?" (Gang Starr / Mass Appeal)
"Old. Can you play something good?"
"When requesting a song, it's probably a good idea not to tell the DJ
that what he's playing is bad. C'mon, darling, it's all about people
skills."
"Just put on some Timberlake, please!!!"
"I weep for the future."

The DJ who was to go on after me was jealous that he couldn't play
what I was playing. He kept saying, "Wow."

Paris, of course, showed up.
"Could you play Michael Jackson?"
"You don't know it yet, but in a few months, you're going to violate
your probation in an alcohol-related reckless driving case and go to
prison for 45 days... Michael Jackson, coming right up!"

Guy in Shiny Shirt : "Hey, bro, could you put on "World Hold On"?"
"Only if I can have some of that blow that's on your mustache..."
"Hey, buddy, you kid me, right?"
"Blow, hold on."

Gwen and crew finally showed, I dropped dancehall gems, got yelled at
by blonde girls, good times for all.

944 2-Year Anniversary Weekend :

I rolled to Vegas with my band to perform at the Hard Rock for the
guys at 944. Outside. Summer. Off to a good start.
DJ 88 opened for us, of course, and killed it, of course.
We played in front of a pool, with all the people crowded around the
sides of the pool, mostly directly across the pool from us, and
nobody was allowed in the pool, except the lifeguard. And a beach
ball. Weird.
The show went well, we played new songs, people got drunk, it was hot
and everyone had a good time.
After the show we went to Body English with all the 944 guys and had
a little after party in the little VIP room they have there, which I,
of course, was the DJ.
Honestly, best party ever...
The next night someone was doing blow off of someone else's boot.

Vegas rules!

Bottles of Patron killed : 6
Guys in shiny shirts : Infinite
Tribal Tattoos : Infinite
Times I saw Lil' Jon make it rain : 1
Times DJ Five stood next to Lil' Jon, while he made it rain : 1
Cabs : 13
Offers for bumps : 23
Real World / Seattle Celebs : 1
Times Paris asked for MJ : 3
Times I imagined my "Happy Place" : 7
Money won at the roulette table: $71
Buffets: 0
Times I saw the Mamu : 1
Air conditioner in my room : 65 degrees
Mini bar bill : $ 125
Shots at the Artisan (Favorite hotel ever) : Can't remember
New BFFs made : 3
Hours of sleep : 5
Top 40 songs played : 0
Times a girl asked me to play some hip hop when I was already playing
hip hop : 3
944 / Racket guys wasted : 14
Times I will go back to party with the 944 / Racket Guys : Infinite
Times I will go back to Lure / Blush, whatever : 0

Recap : Vogue Party

vogue

n 1: the popular taste at a given time;


As guests like The White Stripes, Jet and The Faint were walking in, I decided since it was early, I would play some cool rock shit including Sonic Youth, The Pixies, Blonde Redhead, etc. The girl from Vogue who was in charge came running over... "Could you turn this crap off and put on some hip hop please ?!!"

Good Times...

The party was sponored by Motorola, so there were models walking around with new phones pretending to talk on them as part of the theme of the night. They normally do that anyways..

I didn't get a free phone, but I was offered a good deal on one...

I played an East Indian set and an East Indian girl came over and said, "Do you have any Britney?"

(Tall Blonde Model) "Do you have that song.. uh... um... you know, that one they're playing on the radio all the time? "
"I don't listen to the radio"
"You know, that black guy sings it..."
"Just walk away"

There was a guy who looked and dressed like Gilligan that was on some sort of hallucinogen. He would come over and smile at me, then lay down on the dancefloor and cry.

A girl asked for Portishead. She was wearing all black.

There was a guy who always goes out to every party, drinking the same drink and asking girls the same questions, only to, once again, go home alone and contemplate where he went wrong...

Along with the models walking around serving appetizers, the chef would make an appearance, offering guests his latest (boring) creations. He asked me, "Pasrty filled with cream cheese?"
"Three words... Mushroom Phyllo Triangles...."

A girl fell on the dancefloor and people laughed at her.

Hillary Duff asked me to play Ashley Simpson. Cute. Lame, but cute.

A girl asked if she could borrow a cd cover for a few minutes. She came back and handed it to me with coke residue all over it...
"Now I know that one cocaine effect, appetite suppression, is very popular for people looking to lose weight or maintain a low weight. Fashion models have been known to use cocaine in order to stay thin. But did you know that cocaine can cause convulsions,
seizures, stroke, cerebral hemorrhage and even heart failure? Now go sit in the corner and reflect on your horrible behavior."
...just barely enough left on the cd for me to get a freeze..

There was a camera crew following around a group of good looking, super trendy "in" guys and girls. I think they were filming the pilot for the new reality series, "We Look Absolutely Amazing, There's Gotta Be A Red Carpet Party We Can Crash! Let's Go!"

I love how everyone tells you what they're working on these days and never once thinks to ask you how you're doing...

Paris was there.
Nikki was not.
Over Paris.
Into Nikki.

"I just got Serato and I was wondering if I could pay you to borrow your hard drive so I could have all the music you have?"
"Could I pay you to take the Serato back to wherever you got it and refuse to join in with everyone else who is becoming a DJ but lacking in the musical knowledge, the technical and transitional skills it takes to actually be one?"

One of the editors from Vogue came up to me and said, "You know what would be perfect right now? Chris Brown. His new song is amazing and has a real funky inspiration. You would really get this party going with that if you put it on RIGHT NOW!"
"You know what the perfect accent for your cardigan and your pencil skirt? How about a piece of estate jewelry or a piece that looks convincingly real. Brooches are making a huge comeback: no surprise so since they've been sported by fashionistas like Sarah Jessica Parker. The freshest way to wear major jewelry this season is to pair it almost off-handedly... Pearls mixed with a white shirt, vest and faded denim or wear a sparkly brooch in your hair. They have a real hip hop star / Elisabeth Taylor inspiration, dont you think?"

Random quotes from the party:

"Must finish drink...
Must finish drink...
Then will have fun...
Then will have fun..."

"Ahhhhh....
Now have fun......"

"Um.. Debbie... You are such a liar... That is NOT the Punjabi MC... "

"That's DEFINATELY NOT my hairpiece you're stepping on...."

"NO SILLY! Martinis in left hand...
now, throw up your right..."

"Damn... Desperately Seeking Susan night
was LAST night..."

Cigarettes : 6
Carbs: 0
Vodka/Sodas : 4
Britney requests: 5
Britney spins : 0
Reality shows being filmed : 3
Lame marketing ideas for Motorolla : 3
Dumb models: innumerable
People I related with : 1 (but only when he was lying on the dancefloor crying..)
Times I thought how wrong it was to look at Hillary Duff's ass : 1
Times I actually looked: 3 or 4
Employees of Vogue who sucked : 2
Tips: $20 for "Rockin my world, dude!!"
Pairs of Uggs : 2 (C'mon already)
Rooms that were way too bright with no vibe that people were forced to dance in : 1
Times I wished it was 1994 and I was spinning at a Black Moon show : all night

Recap : Final Night at Joseph's

It's been a good run....
But all good things come to an end....
Farewell Joseph's on a Monday....

or...

It's about fucking time...
Talk about beating a dead horse...
Jesus...

Things I will miss (or not):

Security waving a flashlight at me to move...

Hearing someone yelling, "Jen, hey Jen, over here...."

The smell of good weed....

Drunk bitches bumping the turntables...

Chris Judd...

3 bartenders for 700 people....

Breakdance circles during a down south set?

Blonde 19 year olds requests for Britney or "something good"...
Lets just break that down real quick...
People.. When requesting a song, if you really want the DJ to play your request, or even think about playing it, the last thing you wanna do is say, "something good". This statement is insinuating that what he is playing is not good, therefore becoming, not a request, but an insult. We DJs don't come to Forever 21 during your shift and say things like, "I saw the outfit you put together for that girl, it fucking sucked!" Think people...

Black Eyed Peas dance exhibitions....

The corner make-out booths....

The DJ set-up that had a glowing "Josephs" on the front which changed colors all night... Classy...

The left speaker cutting in and out...

The Lamb chops...

Usher asking for "Usher"....
Celebs love that third person thing...
creepy...

Christina in the booth closest to the restroom...
Bottles-a-poppin...

The bathroom attendant giving grief if no money was left in the guilt basket...

Dancing to the smell of calamari....

Taryn Manning...

Me and Dave Orlando saying things like, "Fuck it, I'm throwing on some Gang Starr..." or "What's this world coming to?"

Sandman yelling, "Oh Shit!!!! That's my jam!!!! then sweating profusely....

MJJ...

No drink tickets....$10 shots of chilled Patron silver...

All of Britney/Janet/Christinas dancers shitting on everyone else...

Spilling drinks and sticky beer floor....

Lights coming on too soon....

The last 10 minutes...
The best music of the night....

"Throw your hands up" records to get some kind of reaction from the sheep...

Girls just standing still on the dance floor if they didn't like or know the song...

Over-crowded patio weaving...

The guys outside waiting to get some celeb to autograph their 8x10...

The Jamaican lady with the roses who makes you feel bad if you don't buy one...

The sweet smell of gourmet dogs outside on an empty/tequila stomach...

$10 parking...

Guys standing around the booth watching us spin, trying to intimidate us, for whatever reason... As if to say, "Yeah, OK, what you got next, huh?"

Dancing to D'Angelo, "Spanish Joint"...

Paris...
Jessica....
Nikki...
Ashley....
(We'll meet again soon, I'm sure...)

Spinning with Dave and laughing about everything...


Rest in Peace Monday nights at Josephs...
Don't worry...
See you all at XES on Saturday....

Recap... New Years Eve... Jimmy Iovine/Dr.Dre/50 Cent Party

I was spinning upstairs, which was where the very limited VIP section was located, complete with more bottles of Cristal than anyone could possibly imagine...

I met the guy who was the money behind the party, his name was Bill... He said one thing to me all night...
"You better be worth what we're paying you, Jimmy is counting on you..."
For those who don't know who Jimmy Iovine is, he's the co-chaiman of Interscope Records, which my band, She Wants Revenge, is indirectly signed to.. No pressure here...

Dr. Dre asked why I was playing so much Biggie...

50 Cent asked if, when it was midnight, I could announce the year as 2050... coincidently the name of his unreleased album...
Jimmy asked as well...
I did...
Coincidently, I felt like a complete idiot....

Dre brought me a bottle of Cristal about five minutes to midnight... I imagined how cool it would've been if it was a 40 of Old English...

A girl asked me if I could play 'Yeah" by Usher, right after everyone says, Happy New Year"...
I replied, "Sure, let's start this year off fresh and new... The first thing I want hear in 2005 is something that I can remember through the whole year... Something that will symbolize how amazing and beautiful the new year will be... Something with lyrics like, "These women all on the prowl, If ya hold the head steady I'm a milk the cow." That's what I want to run through my head as I contemplate the coming year and all its possibilities..."

They kept stopping the music to play some preview tracks from 50's new album and The Game's new album...
Not so hot when you're at a New Years Party and the music keeps stopping, only to be followed by around 30 seconds of silence, while one of Dre's assistants fumbled with the cd player, trying to find the right track, which, when it finally started playing, sounded like shit and wasn't loud enough...

The sound guy slept through the party...

The other sound guy brought me a sandwich...

"Welcome to the year 2050..."
ridiculous...

Its dope when all the lights are on and super bright too...
Makes for a comfortable, yet, mysterious vibe...

Its dope when you're one of the 9 guys who cant get upstairs to the VIP section...
Its not dope when you're one of the 250 super beautiful girls who cant get upstairs to the Vip section, and all you have to work with is 9 dorky guys stuck down there with you...

The promoter "forgot" my check...

From my vantage point, way above everyone downsairs, I could see all the girls who went and got the same outfits that day from Bebe..

Dre asked if I'd like a Cuban cigar or a chronic blunt....
I thought to myself what an asshole I am for quitting...

1:55 am - A girl was found laying face down in the bathroom, super drunk, mumbling, "I'm on my way to my car... I just need a hand getting up... "
2:33 am - She is in a cab now, the cab driver has the address in hand and cash in pocket...
8:12 am - She is not happy....

My friend who used to work for Bad Boy Records, and now works for Aftermath, told me that I didn't have to play so much Biggie... It was ok to put on some 2Pac..
But...
I don't know...
Was it?

"That's right everyone... Welcome to the year 2050..."
super lame...

I was spinning till 4:30 am...
My car broke down on the way home...
Dope vibes...

Recap... Jermaine Dupri / Janet Jackson Party @ Monroes

Sponored by 3 Vodka...
Free 3 Vodka for everyone....
Distilled from soy...
No carbs...

Oh yeah... tates like shit...

The sheriff was there before the party started...
I overheard him say, "I don't care, black people don't listen.."

Usher referred to himself in third person again...
yeah...

Blonde : "Do you think Janet will care if you play Michael?"
"Well, she didn't care when her father did..."

White girls who speak like they're black are neat..

Warren G asked me to play 'Regulators'...
Sure, one sec, Coolio just asked me for 'Gangsta's Paradise', you're gonna have to wait your turn...

Mariah was faded...
She hung out in the booth with me and Jermaine for a while...
She asked me to play 'Virgo' by Nas...
Nice request...
Bad breath...

Alisha Keys wanted to hear Prince...
Go figure...

12:43 A girl tries to get into the VIP section but gets denied.
12:44 She does a line in the bathroom.
12:45 She is in her own VIP section complete with a feeling of euphoria, excitement, reduced hunger and a feeling of strength, not to mention dizziness, a headache, movement problems, anxiety, insomnia, depression and hallucinations.
VIP rules!

Jamie Foxx bumped a girl and made her drop her drink...
Still in character I see..

There was this girl in the VIP area that was trying way too hard to be sexy. She was super drunk and sitting up on the back of a big chair, singing the wrong words to all the songs. She fell off the back of the chair onto the floor... One of those long, drawn out falls that seems like it takes forever... First back onto someone, then over onto her side, then face down onto the floor... People had to help her up... Needless to say, she didn't stay in VIP too much longer...

Star Jones was raising the roof...
Who raises the roof anymore?
C'mon Star, ask Al for a little help...

Ice Cube was there...
DMX was there...
Rappers turned actors are neat...

Da Brat was an asshole...
Da Asshole...

Jermaine had a diamond watch bigger than himself..
Janet's ass was bigger than Jermaine as well...

'Drop It Like It's Hot' is the new "Yeah"...
over it...

At one point, right before the party really got going, Jermaine told the crowd to stop standing around acting Hollywood...
Welcome to my world Jermaine...

A girl asked if I could play some hip hop..
I was playing Mobb Deep...
New Jacks...

I got a contact high from all the weed smoke in the booth..
Thanks Warren, Regulators coming right up, I swear...

A girl offered me $1 to hold her coat..

Security found a g-string in the VIP section after everyone was gone...
Probably the girl who wanted me to hold her coat...

Cigarettes : 0
Carbs : 0
Vodka and sodas : 4
Bad outfits : 29
Times I got caught looking at Mariah's cleavage : 1
Times Da Brat gave me a dirty look for no reason : 7
Fake Prada bags : 12
Pimp cups : 2
$39 Parking tickets : 1
Requests for The Game : 9
Times I wondered if people refer to him as "The Game" when speaking to him : 1
Times I wondered if people refer to Da Brat as "Da Brat" when speaking to her: 1
Times this thought was cleared up while listening to people speak to Da Brat and refer to her as "Brat" : 1
Times I was called a "Bad ass white boy" : 3
Times I looked forward to being on tour : 13
Glasses filled with Hypnotiq : 36
Times I will ever drink something Blue : 0
Names I dropped : 13

Recap : Random Thursday at Area

I had to pay $20 to park...
Off to a good start..

Area used to be Prey, which used to be the Gate. I used to spin there back in the day when it was the gate, so every time I go there, I'm reminded of the days when I used to spin on Eurotrash night and get tipped in $100 bills and blow...

I kept the money, flushed the blow...

Well, maybe a freeze...

The GM came over to me before it opened and told me he had drink tickets for me...
Never happened...

A blonde girl asked me if I'd play a new Chingy song...
Didn't happen either...

Jamie Foxx was wearing a bandana over his nose and mouth like he was gonna hold up the place... Maybe he was preparing for his next role in "Gay"...
He liked when I played "Him or Me" by Today..

Patron Shots were $18...

There were guys next to the booth all night smoking blunts...
I got yelled at for smoking a cigarette...

Lots of requests for Journey...
Lots of requests for "Sweet Child O' Mine"
Lots of requests for Def Leopard...
Lots of requests for "ironic" music...
When will this phase pass? It was cool to play a few "ironic" songs in your set around 3 years ago, and that lasted around 4 months... At this point, it's just gay...

(I love "ironic" music, but in my car..)

I was doing goofy dances in the booth to make my friends laugh...
At the end of the night, a girl told me I had sexy moves..
She was serious...

A girl was on the phone all night...
She was sitting in the middle of a loud club...
Was she really talking to someone or was she pulling a Paris Hilton and pretending to talk to someone because she was so insecure...

Lindsay Lohan was there...
Again...
She asked for the new Scissor Sisters song...
Again..
I didn't play it..
Again..

A girl asked me to play a song by She Wants Revenge..
I told her I don't play my own music...
She asked what that had to do with her request...
I left it alone...

Lots of dudes in sunglasses...

Still no drink tickets...

There was a scuffle right in front of me between two dunk girls...
They were both hammered...
One called the other one a "...fucking tree..."
Rad.

Paris was there...
On the phone...

Some dude asked me to play some Techno...
He was one of the ones with the sunglasses on...
He called me "Bro"...
He spent a lot of time in the Men's room as well...
Needless to say, I never played it...

I played a 15 minute 80s set and a girl asked me if I was gonna play anything current...
This was 5 minutes after i had finished the 80s set and was playing Justin Timberlake...
I told her to open system preferences, go to date and time, and change it from 12:15 to 12:20...

Lots of differences between the Indie parties I've been spinning at while on the road and the Hollywood Clubs I do when I'm at home...

1. Drinks are $5 at the Indie parties, you can get water for $5 in Hollywood...
2. Still lots of asymmetrical haircuts at both, but I'm sure in Hollywood they cost around 10 times more and were performed in a Salon while listening to the latest Ibiza mix...
3. In Hollywood, nobody asks for The Knife...
4. At Indie clubs, nobody asks for Jamie Foxx...
5. in Hollywood, Jamie Foxx asks for Jamie Foxx... (he Really did...)
6. In Hollywood, beers are in glasses...
7. In Hollywood, nobody's heard of Sparks...
8. At Indie clubs, there is no bottle service... Although someone should start a 40 ounce bottle service at Indie parties, that would be rad...
9. At Indie parties, there's always someone snapping photos inside to post on some website...
10. In Hollywood, there's always a line of Paparazzi outside snapping photos to sell to some magazine...
11. At Indie parties, people do coke...
12. In Hollywood, people do pink coke...

1:19 am - 2 drink tickets...
1:23 am - 2 drink tickets get me one chilled shot of Patron Silver...

The guy that usually does his Michael Jackson routine to "Billie Jean" was there...
He didn't do it...
He did his new shit...
His Prince routine to "Kiss"...
Times are changing...

A blonde girl asked me to play "... some Crunk music"
I weep for the future..

Chilled Patron Silver Shots : 2
Dudes in sunglasses : 18
Tips : $150
Ironic songs played : 0
Gang Starr songs played : 2
Number of people who knew what I was playing : 7
Number of Camp Lo songs I played : 2
Number of people who knew what I was playing : 7
Girl Fights : 2
Calls Paris made : 5
People she actually called : 0
Number of Crunk songs : 0
Blunts smoked next to me : 4
Cigarettes I smoked : 8
Times Fergie was requested : 14
Times Fergie was played : 0
Shiny shirts : 34
Number of long songs I played in order to make it to the restroom and back before it ended : 2
Amount of time it took to get my car from valet : 30 mins



Good times...